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Found something that works for me...

September 16th, 2005 at 09:04 pm

So, I'm not doing a very good job at saving. Instead I'm working on not spending and paying off the cc's at this point in my life. The challenge I have is that (like this week) I clean out the checking account to make a huge payment on the cc. This brings the balance on the cc down significantly and one day will result in a big ol' ZERO balance Smile this will be a very good day.

However (always a however) it means that I have little (no) cash on hand until the next pay period at the end of the month. During my days of impulse spending, I would use the cc to cover wants until the next pay period, charging as much as or more than the last payment. This was like treading water. Actually, it was even worse, b/c interest accrued, adding to the balance even more. And with plastic, its so much easier to spend freely.

After the warm fuzzy of making a huge payment wears off, I feel this sense of anxiety which leads me to believe that i NEED everything that even remotely appeals to me. About 10% might be legit, but I could pass on them if I worked at it. Its a strange feeling that takes over my thinking even though I KNOW we have everything, everything that we need in the house and we are covered until the end of the month. In my more logical moments, I see that I have nothing to worry about.

To resolve this reasonless anxiety, I've come up with a plan. When I feel this mood come over me, I pull out the master spreadsheet and budgt the item into the next pay period where it will fit. Right now, the splurges are being put into the end of October budget. My goal is still to make large payments on the cc's. On my list are: a new lunch bag - one that will keep food cold, but it easy to clean. The current one is getting past it. I'm starting to wonder what lurks in the corners; a couple of products from Neutrogena; and some nutritional supplements that I want to stock up on while I have the cash to do so. Looking at the numbers, I'm already maxing out the late Oct budget. But I suppose that better than maxing out the cc!!

This helps to allay my anxiety for now. I am reassured that I can have these things should I still want them in the future, so I'm not feeling deprived. And who knows, by the time I get to late Oct, I may not really want any of them - or even better, a less expensive alternative or will have come along in the meantime.

I've found a solution, but it also shows me again that the acquiring of stuff drives a lot of my thinking, which in turn drives my actions. That still bothers me deeply. There is a poverty of spirit about it that bothers me.

I'm going to work on that...I will try to avoid shopping as much as I can for the next couple of weeks. I'll try to make it until I get paid again. That will be a stretch, but if this method is going to work for me, this will be a good test. What if I see a really good sale? hmmm....the wiser part of me says I am fine with all the things I currently have and I should pass. The consumer in me screams BUY IT!!! BUY TWO OR THREE. YOU MAY NEVER SEE IT AT THIS PRICE EVER, EVER AGAIN. I think the consumer in my is out to undermine me in the long run...Can that be exorcised, I wonder?

1 Responses to “Found something that works for me...”

  1. Anonymous Says:
    1126942489

    Ah the consumer voice. The next time it runs around like that, take a deep breath and ask yourself one question: So?

    I love it, I want it! So?
    I want it, I really need it! So?
    It will disappear if I don't buy it and I will never get another one. So?

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